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You had told her before about pools of light
how once, one friend less from pains in chests
you had slept in sun stretching through trees
Bungy cords of heat flattening like honey across bare grass
and leaving something of the harsh glare in your eyes
only somehow softer; the smallest solar flare
flashes of a wave goodbye

Now, with autumn pirouetting in the air
heady warmth in colour alone
and summer left etching initials on misted windows
you find yourself there again

Her hand is small in yours, fingers entwined
urgent at their leisure, fiercely accepting
but the winter coat feels out of season
leaves her maybe miles away
and, true, you’ve been unsettled that maybe
maybe
she doesn’t want her hand in yours
like there’s a band on your chest, your heart, tight

Maybe she knows it, feels it too
because as she slides the coat from her shoulders
and it rolls off her back like water, like a breath out
she leaves herself bare
shedding barriers like the butterflies that, later
she’ll tell you she had when you met

She finds your hand on her other side
tugs at it with her own, pulls your arm closer in
until you’re her duvet, her man
it’s light-years from dry mouths
licking lips for first kisses
and it says something else
truly now, we’re close

Here, again, are patchworks of light and shade
colouring in cold winter breath with ochre
hard ground with olive
air with electricity

She’s been anxious, she’s said
which for everything feels so strange
with leaves dropping like rain
and breaths caught for a kiss

you’re almost sure when you open your eyes
that trees will be stripped bare
frost will litter the ground
and sighs will billow out in white

But she’s there, telling you that you’re looking good, today
the sky season-streaked with sparks and comet trails
genuinely, sincerely warm
Anxious?
As she walks away, you want to grab her
tell her that for real, now
you know just how okay it’s going to be
but as she leaves the park and slips her coat back on
less a shield from you, more a replacement in your absence
you realise, so quickly
that maybe she already knows